down by the old main drag

[aria]

Despite the tried-and-true cheering-up methods of dressing snazzy, having hot chocolate, reading comfort stories, and enthusiastically tackling the slush pile, my brain is still having one of those days where I cannot stop overthinking and being anxious about nearly everything. Writing ridiculous fic may be the ticket, but in the meantime, it seems like everyone is having a rubbish November so far, and so I propose:

IMPROMPTU ROUNDS OF MARRY-SHAG-CLIFF! Ask me characters! Ask me for characters! Interrogate me on why I'd ever think marrying x would be a valid life choice! I realize that midafternoon on a Thursday is a ridiculous time for this sort of thing, but hell, this can be an all-day party. Have at it.

Comments

[labellementeuse]

ALIENS. Wow. Well ... cliff Roshaun cos I'm not really a fan, marry Sker'ret cos I think he's kind of great, and shag Filif (CAREFULLY) cos he's into human girls.

Geoffrey, Oliver, Ellen, and now you're sorry for giving me a centipede, a tree, and an asshole. ;)

[aria]

SHAG FILIF CAREFULLY. <3

Ohhhh god. I'd be terrified of getting involved with any of them! I suppose I'd marry Geoffrey -- never a dull moment! -- and shag Ellen, provided she didn't mind I was a young woman instead of a young man. Oliver can haunt me disappointedly.

In the Slings & Arrows vein: Richard, Anna, Darren!

[labellementeuse]

I agree with your selections. Well, I might marry Ellen. IDK.

OH MY. Um ... shag Richard because although I despise him in every other way, he seems GGG in the sack. Marry Darren because at least it'd be hilarious. Cliff Anna NOT because I don't ADORE her, because I do - much more than Richard or Darren - but because I would walk all over her and I HATE that in a relationship.

[labellementeuse]

Oh! Also! Chloe, Lana, Clark.

[aria]

I am impressed by your not cliffing Richard! And your reasons for cliffing Anna are probably the nicest cliffing reasons I have ever seen. :)

Oh Jesus, I don't want to be married to any of those kids. I AM CLIFFING LANA THOUGH, mostly to put her out of her plot-device misery. I guess I would rather be married to Chloe than Clark, and it's not like shagging Clark would be a hardship.

Hm. Lois, Lex, Ollie!

[labellementeuse]

I bet Lana is the most-cliffed character in history and BEING MARRIED TO CHLOE WOULD BE AWESOME, ARIA. (I'd probably cliff Clark and shag Lana. She was really hot when she was fucking Lex.)

AHAHA so I haven't seen Smallville since season 3 or 4 and have no idea what Smallville Lois and Ollie are like! So I'm basing my answers on comics canon which means CLIFF OLLIE because he is a) an asshole b) the worst mentor ever, shag Lex even though I kind of... eh, but I definitely DON'T want to be married to him cos that way lies death, and also it frees me up to marry Lois, who is AMAZING. (and is married to Superman, so I mean. Yeah.)

The Lone Power, Nimueh, and the Master. (SEXY EVIL.)

[aria]

See, I want to be BFFs with Chloe! But I am not sure how good she would be as a romantic partner. STILL I BET WE COULD MAKE THAT MARRIAGE WORK. I am delighted you are shagging Lana rather than cliffing her! Lana needs some love and I do not think I am capable of giving it to her.

Oh man I think I totally agree with those choices! Alas Smallville!Lois is one of the less awesome iterations, but she's still Lois, which automatically makes her kind of awesome. Ollie is always an asshole. XD

Oooh sexy evil! I, um. I think I may have to marry the Master, because SOMEHOW HE IS THE LEAST WORRYING PROSPECT. And I, um. Nimueh gets cliffed, not because she isn't awesome but because, dude. Shagging the Lone Power. Assuming It was in one of Its sexy incarnations, I would be ALL OVER THAT. I am the worst wizard. XD

Tom, Carl, and ... Harry, I suppose?

[labellementeuse]

To be honest, it's not even that I like Lana, but I think she's pretty super hot, which pretty much makes me That Guy. Guilt, guilt. I'm trying to like her, though.

Dude, ALL the wizards want to shag the Lone Power. Nita definitely does. Pretty much every time we see him, someone thinks how hot he is (and when is someone going to address the fact that even when Nita *isn't* around, Kit sees the LP as a hot redheaded guy in a power suit? Just sayin'.)

OH WHAT IS THAT. OH NO YOU DIN'T. Cliff Harry (sorry Harry, there's always Timeheart I guess?) shag Mr. Millman because I am a wild breaker of rules, and MARRY TOM AND CARL AND LIVE WITH THEM ADORABLY BECAUSE THEY CAN NEVER BE BROKEN UP, GOSH ARIA. Even tho I would be allergic to their house (dog hair) but you know. I'm sure the good looking men would make the antihistamines worth it.

Kit, Ronan, Darryl.

[aria]

Ahaha. Lana: making us worse human beings since 2001! Something like that.

Okay, this is fair! That's because the Lone Power is a seductive hotass. <3 (Except in Wizard Abroad! And I guess in Wizards at War. It is more disappointing in Wizard Abroad, though.)

FAIR, VERY FAIR. I approve of shagging Mr. Millman! Also TOM AND CARL SHOULD NEVER BE BROKEN UP, THIS IS TRUTH. Also, you might not even need antihistamines! I bet there is some sort of spell for allergies.

Oooh. Marrying Kit, definitely; I love that boy. Even if aged up, I think I find Ronan more attractive than Darryl, or at least more ... touchable? IDK. I will shag Ronan and leave Darryl to do his awesome Darryl thing.