Entry tags:
a quick tour of aria's psyche
I have lately (and by "lately" I mean "at various points over the last year or so") been absently tracking down and rewatching favorite childhood films. Among other things, I have discovered that [a] The Lion King is still totally awesome and [b] lots of those childhood films, especially the live action ones, make me cry. Large bits throughout Matilda made me tear up. The end of Homeward Bound made me sob! My inner child is totally bewildered, but apparently my inner child took for granted that the animals would get home or that movie narratives totally understood me and also, obviously, my brain would give me superpowers.
The point is, though, that when I was a kid, the only goddamn movie in the world that made me cry was The Land Before Time, when Littlefoot's mother dies. (You all cried. Don't lie.) I was always mildly embarrassed and totally bewildered when my parents cried at movies, especially at happy endings. But now ... I really love crying at things. I am working through how to phrase that without sounding odd? I think it's something about how I want to function as a sane adult, which means that occasionally I also want to bawl my eyes out because it's the end of Toy Story 3, and know that it's a good emotional outlet. I love good emotional outlets! It probably comes down to how I'd much rather cry because I've been emotionally touched than just because I'm stressed about something.
Some things that make me cry:
+ Vienna Teng songs (City Hall, Grandmother Song, & Lullaby for a Stormy Night)
+ vids to Vienna Teng songs (Lullaby for a Stormy Night, Doctor Who, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.)
+ most vids about awesome ladies being awesome (most consistently One Girl Revolution)
+ many films! Lilo & Stitch (anyone says "ohana means family" and I run for the tissues); Homeward Bound (the endiiiing); Return of the King (it's the Grey Havens! quick, run for the tissues!); Toy Story 3 (the endiiiiiiing, I COULDN'T EVEN SEE); Star Trek reboot (the first five minutes! and now that I have watched lots of TOS, I start crying at the end too, oh self).
+ the ending of Big Fish YES IT GETS ITS OWN BULLET POINT I THINK MY FRIENDS AND I COLLECTIVELY WENT THROUGH A WHOLE BOX OF TISSUES
So ... does anyone else do this? And by 'this' I mean either cry at any of these things also, or actively keep track of go-to things to cry to because emotional outlets are great. (Honestly I just like keeping lists of things that elicit emotional states. For instance, I also have a mental list of Hottest Things Ever, although eventually it'll need more on it than just a lieutenant colonel is being beaten. Strangely I don't have a mental list of Things That Always Make Me Happy, although the answer to that one might be "due South." Hm.)
The point is, though, that when I was a kid, the only goddamn movie in the world that made me cry was The Land Before Time, when Littlefoot's mother dies. (You all cried. Don't lie.) I was always mildly embarrassed and totally bewildered when my parents cried at movies, especially at happy endings. But now ... I really love crying at things. I am working through how to phrase that without sounding odd? I think it's something about how I want to function as a sane adult, which means that occasionally I also want to bawl my eyes out because it's the end of Toy Story 3, and know that it's a good emotional outlet. I love good emotional outlets! It probably comes down to how I'd much rather cry because I've been emotionally touched than just because I'm stressed about something.
Some things that make me cry:
+ Vienna Teng songs (City Hall, Grandmother Song, & Lullaby for a Stormy Night)
+ vids to Vienna Teng songs (Lullaby for a Stormy Night, Doctor Who, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.)
+ most vids about awesome ladies being awesome (most consistently One Girl Revolution)
+ many films! Lilo & Stitch (anyone says "ohana means family" and I run for the tissues); Homeward Bound (the endiiiing); Return of the King (it's the Grey Havens! quick, run for the tissues!); Toy Story 3 (the endiiiiiiing, I COULDN'T EVEN SEE); Star Trek reboot (the first five minutes! and now that I have watched lots of TOS, I start crying at the end too, oh self).
+ the ending of Big Fish YES IT GETS ITS OWN BULLET POINT I THINK MY FRIENDS AND I COLLECTIVELY WENT THROUGH A WHOLE BOX OF TISSUES
So ... does anyone else do this? And by 'this' I mean either cry at any of these things also, or actively keep track of go-to things to cry to because emotional outlets are great. (Honestly I just like keeping lists of things that elicit emotional states. For instance, I also have a mental list of Hottest Things Ever, although eventually it'll need more on it than just a lieutenant colonel is being beaten. Strangely I don't have a mental list of Things That Always Make Me Happy, although the answer to that one might be "due South." Hm.)
no subject
The end was freaking heartbreaking. Happy, but in this bittersweet way; it's as happy as it could be but it's still, you know, Jackie Paper's not coming back anymore, Puff. :(
Star Trek reboot (the first five minutes! and now that I have watched lots of TOS, I start crying at the end too, oh self).
Oh hell yes. The scene where Jim's being born is so well done, it should be totally OTT but somehow it's not. But it's Spock's quiet 'Thrusters on full' at the end that makes my stomach totally hurt every time.
no subject
...Which reminds me, that song did make me cry as a kid! I didn't appreciate crying then, though, because HOW DARE JACKIE DO THAT, I WON'T GROW UP. Which is to say, very much, yes, this.
Also yes to everything re: Star Trek! I'm amazed at how I really do manage to cry every single time that first scene happens; I have to awkwardly wipe my eyes over the title card. And Spock's "Thrusters on full" is where I start to tear up again, and then it just gets more absurd during his voiceover, and by the time the remixed credits music comes on, I'm toast.
no subject
no subject
Books: Markus Zusak's The Book Thief, because holy shit, this book had me sobbing inconsolably at 1 AM all through the last 100 pages or so. If you haven't read it, it's the story of a young German girl fostered with a German family during WWII, and her story is told through Death's POV. I found it devastating on first read, but increasingly comforting on reread. It still wrecks me by the end though. Other than that, Deathly Hallows is my go-to for a good, comforting cry.
Music: "Hope There's Someone" by Antony and the Johnson's. I first heard this song in an episode of Torchwood, and it made me cry then even though I didn't give a shit about the episode itself. It's just stunning and vulnerable and gorgeous. And the choral arrangement of Barber's "Adagio for Strings," "Agnus Dei," gives me tears of awe.
Movies: Ahahah, I am with you on RotK. It was airing on TNT the other night, and it made me all teary eyed all over again. For a recent movie that gets the waterworks going, Up makes me cry an embarrassingly lot.
There's probably a bunch of other stuff I'm not thinking of, but those are the main ones!
no subject
I think I would like to look up that music you mention! I don't think I've heard any of it, except perhaps the song that was on Torchwood; I haven't seen Torchwood in ages, though, so who knows.
no subject
Here's a link for Hope There's Someone, and Agnus Dei.
no subject
My list used to go:
The list has significantly expanded since then, to the extent that I can't keep track of it. But Spock's death still does it every time.
no subject
no subject
It's just lovely, isn't it? The glass. The dialogue and the callbacks. The bromance. The horrendous overacting that, for once, doesn't simply just work, it's actually required. I don't know what I was thinking when I was fourteen and loved this film, but now, it's just a marvellous piece of cinema.
Now I come to think about it, it may be two scenes in A Few Good Men.
no subject
no subject
In the interest of responding to the actual topic of your post, I also track things that make me cry. Although at the moment it's a pretty short list:
1) Bridge to Terrebithia, book or movie. (Heck, the movie made my Dad cry too, and the last time I'd seen anything do THAT was when Grandma died, so, you know. Very sad story.)
2) Buffy the Vampire Slayer's "The Body", which may be the saddest piece of television I've ever seen in my life. (Although SG1's "Heros" and Torchwood's "Exit Wounds" are also serious contenders; I just havn't tried re-watching them enough to know if they're reliable criers or not.)
I cry at lots of things, but those are the only two that are guarenteed to set me off. Sometimes a piece of music will make me cry; sometimes, it does nothing. On one viewing I'll laugh off a movie; on another, I'll bawl my eyes out. Heck, I just watched the Eleventh Hour again, and got all teary when the new sonic screwdriver pops up and the Doctor whispers "thanks, dear" to the TARDIS, which was definitly not a moment that I thought was a misty-eyes moment the first time through.
no subject
I think my mother read me Bridge to Terrebithia when I was very young, so I only have vague memories of it, involving my ABJECT HORROR that one of the main characters died. I suspect if I could get over that I might be able to have a good cry at it, though.
Oh god, The Body. I think I usually start crying when Anya does.
On one viewing I'll laugh off a movie; on another, I'll bawl my eyes out.
Yes, this! I am that way with many things. The fact that Lullaby for a Stormy Night and bits of Star Trek reboot consistently make me cry is kind of amazing, because of that.
no subject
I usually start crying when Buffy tells Giles not to move the body... and then get myself under control just in time to start crying again when Anya does. Oh, god, that speech.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
Some things that will reliably make me cry:
- a ridiculous number of Stan Rogers songs, but chiefly "White Squall" and "First Christmas". Heck, I cry just telling other people what those songs are about
- The bit in Little Women where Beth dies
- "The Corinthian", a song by Aengus Finnan
- probably other stuff too, I just haven't seen/read/heard it often enough to know how reliable a tearjerker it is
Other things that have made me cry:
- every sad movie I have ever watched
- a whole lot of fanfic
- the occasional sad book
- tv episodes where a character dies in a particularly tragic way ("Exit Wounds", "The Body", for example)
- I'm with you on on the first five minutes of Star Trek XI. I didn't cry the first time I saw it, but the second time through, wow, hello unexpected tears.
- many other things
But mostly if I'm in a mood to cry I go to Stan Rogers or Little Women. I don't really NEED a list beyond that.
no subject
I had Little Women read to me long before I was at an age when I even remotely enjoyed feeling sad about things, so the mention of Beth dying mostly just makes me go :((( I am sure it would make me cry now, though.
- a whole lot of fanfic
This sometimes happens to me! It has to be something I am HUGELY INVESTED IN, though, so ... it's mostly due South fic that makes me cry, and mostly at happy endings. I am still secretly searching for the grail of Highlander fic that makes me cry, but it might be a lost cause.
no subject
Also, a song called "Mein Berlin" by the German singer Reinhard Mey that is a beautiful, beautiful song-history about the division and reunion of Berlin. There's a bit near the end where he sings "Freiheit-- endlich Freiheit über meiner Stadt" (Freedom, finally freedom in my city) and his voice soars up over recordings of the crowds cheering at the Brandenburg Gate the night the Wall came down and even writing this has made me teary-eyed. But yeah. Same weird thing about not listening to it too often.
no subject
That ... really makes sense to me! I don't think I've ever overindulged in sadness, but I do know there are a few pieces of music that give me awed shivers, but only if I listen to them very much in moderation.
no subject
I do have a mental list of Hottest Things Ever, though, and a haphazard one for "when I'm in a Mood and I just want to stew in it a while".
no subject
I should organize my Hottest Things Ever list! Also, I am curious about your haphazard in-a-Mood-and-want-to-stew list.
no subject
Movies I find it less easy to cry at. I cried at the beginning of Up! and I generally get teary at the end of RotK.
On the other hand, I've been known to tear up on the tour of Independence Hall. Oh, self.
ETA: OMG, how could I forget the Arcade Fire!? "Wake Up", "Keep the Car Running", and unpredictable songs on The Suburbs make me cry pretty easily.
no subject
On the other hand, I've been known to tear up on the tour of Independence Hall. Oh, self.
I don't think I have a concrete example like that, but I definitely tear up at real events/places and then feel mildly ridiculous. :)
no subject
BUT. My list, such as it is:
- Dot and the Kangaroo, the movie, when I was 6
- one episode of Grey's Anatomy
- my girls-are-great vid for cathartic teariness (which I am still terrible at, but sometimes it works!) is the one to What About Everything.
Songs that make me FEEL like crying are Brothers in Arms (DAMN YOU AARON SORKIN) and Heather Dale's Trial of Lancelot which is basically the most heartbreaking thing you've ever heard if you were even a LITTLE bit Arthurian-obsessed as a kid.
no subject
Oooh, the first time I watched What About Everything it made me cry too! It does so less now, because One Girl Revolution > everything for making me cry happy tears, but sometimes they both do it, like an alarming double-whammy of awesomeness.
Trial of Lancelot is gorgeous! Thank you for linking it. :) Alas, no matter how beautiful, I don't think it can make me cry, because whenever the narrative swings around to Lancelot my overwhelming emotion is to SHAKE EVERYONE UNTIL THEY BECOME REASONABLE, and then I get distracted by a half-formed cyberpunk retelling of Arthurian legend that I have in my head, and ... anyway. :D
no subject
- The Fall
- In Bruges
- Reservoir Dogs
- FEELINGS EXPLOSION ALCHEMIST OF MY GOD THEY SO WERE NOT KIDDING.
It is possible I have forgotten something but probably not since in general most of my feelings consist of "FUCK YEAH!!!!!"
who is procrastinating? i am procrastinating! HOW CAN THIS BE.no subject
Now if you will excuse me I have to go watch The Fall again A MILLION TIMES.
no subject
Oh, gosh, me too. EVERY TIME. And I'd even heard the song before, so the emotional impact should have been dulled for me. BUT NO.
Hi, you don't know me, I've just read a bunch of things you wrote and now that I'm here on DW I decided to subscribe. I take it that's the accepted protocol around here? But since it seems slightly stalkerish to subscribe and run, this is me, saying HI.
no subject
And hallo! That is definitely accepted protocol, and not stalkerish. :D
no subject
Although I'm not actually a huge fan of "Sleeping in Light," Ivanova's speech about new beginnings, over the image of Babylon 5 being decommissioned, does make me a little misty.
The first and so far as I remember only fanfic I ever cried at was one that Google is just not producing for me right now. But it was an SG-1 fic that involved this apocalyptic, SG-1-tries-to-fend-off-Goa'uld-invaders-style situation, and they're losing. At the end, Sam and Jack are huddled together under a table or something and he starts talking about his cabin and recites some lines from "The Lake Isle of Innisfree," and then they get up and go out to make a last, fatal stand against the Goa'uld. It was really affecting; my summary doesn't do it justice.
no subject
I ... confess I cried at Sleeping in Light. But then, the Grey Havens at the end of Lord of the Rings also makes me cry, so this should be surprising to exactly no one. Heh. :)
And that fic you describe sounds awesome and harrowing. Let me know if you do track it down again!
no subject
Found it! It is, um. A lot more purple and a lot less affecting than I remembered, actually. I cannot quite fathom what my nineteen-year-old self was thinking. Read at your own risk.
(I think perhaps I am just so taken with that particular poem that for me it elevates the prose around it...)
no subject
But I didn't actually cry that much during the last Harry Potter book, so go figure.
no subject
You and Sares are giving me so many reasons to watch FMA! by which I mean you cried and it gave her ~feelings~, both of which are pretty strong recommendations.
I do not at all judge you for having to pull over and cry to Blame it on the Pop. I have done the same for, ah, Disney musicals at eight in the morning. Yeah, I don't know either.
Do I need to see A Very Potter Musical? I started and then got bored and wandered away, and I am not sure if that is some kind of sacrilege.
no subject
no subject
Up should probably be on my list too, but ... if the whole theatre is crying it feels somehow invalidated? I don't know, by that logic I really shouldn't count Toy Story 3 either. Heh.
no subject
- the ending of Kipling's "Jungle Books", where Mowgli leaves the jungle.
- the last chapters in "Call of the Wild" (the Jack London book, that is).
- the ending of
Oh yeah, and have you seen this vid? It is "Lullaby for a stormy night" + Sound of Music.
no subject
Hey, well, if I didn't give my eyes all the exercise they needed by rolling them at the epilogue, the end of due South's Call of the Wild would probably make me cry too. ;)
fgs;kldslf Dysmas! I mean, to be fair, everything that troyswann writes gives me FEELINGS, SO MANY FEELINGS, but that's an especially good one to point out.
I have indeed seen that vid! It is very sweet, although it does not make me cry the same way the Doctor Who version does.
no subject
(Lullaby for a Stormy Night, Doctor Who, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.)
YES. That makes me cry. I'm not even sure why, but it does.
The death of Tara Maclay made me cry. And the death of Tessa Noel. Most of all, the death of Joyce Summers.
Return of the King. Every single time.
Things That Don't:
Never saw any of the Land Before Time movies. However, I didn't cry when Bambi's mother bought it. Does that give you an idea?
I was actually relieved when Beth March died. This was probably because she was suffering from the literary symptoms of TB, which, in Victorian lit, always seemed to involve getting paler, thinner, frailer and more angelic. Quite a few virtuous souls in Victorian lit seemed to perish that way, especially if they were women or young girls.
(The prevalence of this in nineteenth-century literature convinced me when I was very young that there was no percentage in overwhelming amounts of virtue, because if you were excessively kind, merciful, helpful and humble, you would be declared Too Good For This World, and then God would kill you. I did not understand why God made a habit of killing off good people, but I had read about the Greek gods and none of them had been particularly rational, either.)
Star Trek Reboot didn't make me cry--probably because that isn't MY Star Trek. I didn't believe for one minute that Chris Pine grew up to be William Shatner or that Zoe Saldana became Nichelle Nicholls or that Karl Urban had ANYTHING in common with DeForrest Kelley. They didn't act poorly; I just didn't believe that they were Kirk, Uhura or McCoy. They didn't look like them, and they sure didn't behave like them. It's just a fanfic in the form of a movie...and I feel free to ignore fanfic if it fucks with canon in a way that I can't find credible.
most vids about awesome ladies being awesome (most consistently One Girl Revolution)
One Girl Revolution didn't make me cry. It made me CHEER. (And request permission of the vidder to put it in Femgenficathon's profile. With credit, of course.)
no subject
Yes, yes to all of these things. Weirdly, even though I've been watching Highlander completely haphazardly and out of order, which means I really shouldn't have become that attached to Tessa (I've only seen about half a dozen episodes with her in them) remembering her death still makes my chest hurt. Huh.
One Girl Revolution didn't make me cry. It made me CHEER.
Oh yes, this too! One Girl Revolution -- and, in fact, most women-are-awesome multifandom vids -- do make me cry, but with sheer undiluted joy.
no subject
1. The ending of The Fall. That affected me so badly that I was still crying several hours later. For weeks afterwards I'd be going about my business and then I'd randomly remember it and I'd start crying again. I could hardly stand it because it was so, so similar to the way the inside of my head works sometimes (if you imagine that I'm both Alexandria and Roy in this scenario) and I had no idea it was going to happen so it caught me completely off-guard. The DVD was a Christmas present, that was the first time I'd watched it, and I haven't been able to bring myself to watch it again.
2. The scene in Watchmen where Rorschach is given the Rorschach test. Specifically, his answers and the tone of voice in which he gives them. God knows why that set me off as badly as it did but I was crying on-and-off for the rest of the film. I own that DVD too, and haven't rewatched it.
Loads of music makes me cry. Most live music will, actually, unless I dislike it.
no subject
For some reason the ending of the Fall didn't make me unhappy cry? I think that may have had a lot to do with how, immediately after finishing it, I immediately ran to Yuletide and read all of the fic I could. That was an extremely effective pick-me-up.
no subject
Sometimes when you post I feel like we should have been best friends in grade school. That's weird. I could have introduced you to Star Trek and we could have watched X-Men cartoons.
no subject
...Oh man, in the AU where we were best friends in grade school, things are EPIC. We would have watched so many X-Men cartoons, and it is possible that Kirk/Spock would've been baby's first slash pairing instead of Frodo/Sam. :D