despondency

[aria]

4x05 The Ladies Man

How much do I love this episode? A lot. Forget the social commentary -- actually don't forget the social commentary, that's a large part of why I love this episode -- but for the Ray stuff alone I adore it. He's so tangled up inside and it comes out as bitching about littering and social order, and I don't ... really think he was ever in danger of shooting that guy, but honestly it's no wonder he's become less screwed-up about being a cop with Fraser around; Fraser's there to remind him what he is when he starts losing it. I especially love that this carries even through Ray's conviction that he doesn't have a choice about whether Beth Botrelle lives or dies, and when Fraser says, "You always have a choice," he means it, even in a death penalty case that seems out of their hands. Love that.

I am also quite fond of the bartender. (In fact, there is a wonderful fic about him here; I didn't even notice him the first time through but man do I notice him after that fic.) I am endlessly amused at his helpful attempts to put words in Ray's mouth, and also his obvious fascination with these two crazy guys who have come wandering into his bar. <3

I am pretty sure the timeline in this episode is screwed up, though. I shouldn't bother worrying, because it's not like I haven't been there and done that years ago in Harry Potter fandom, but assuming that this episode takes place in 1998, Ray says eight years ago -- 1990 or thereabouts -- he was a rookie in uniform. That's all very well, except Fraser says in Eclipse that in 1988 Ray got his first citation for rescuing a boy from a hostage situation, and the way Ray screwed up with Beth Botrelle's case, I am pretty sure he was not competent enough for citations two years previously. (Either way getting a citation in '88 is pretty impressive, because Ray would've been in his early-to-mid-20s then and almost certainly would've been a rookie regardless.) Anyway, I have worried about the math, now I am going to handwave it and move on.

Re: the social commentary, though, one of the important things here is that the death penalty is Not Okay. Dewey has a need to be satisfied that Botrelle is going to be executed, because she killed a cop and it's not as though Dewey shouldn't feel something because of that, but Welsh knows this and still tells him off for making the celebration a public spectacle, because of all things a death sentence shouldn't be that. Ray is deeply upset about all this because he's convinced Botrelle didn't do it -- and it might be partly motivated by guilt but his instincts are good, and more to the point there's a genuine chance she didn't do it. (It's possibly important to understand here that I come at this episode as someone who is absolutely opposed to the death penalty, in part for that very reason -- there's every chance someone innocent could be put to death, and it's not worth that chance.) And oh god, Ray's "So we should kill her to avoid any bad press ... sir?" gets me where I live. Sometimes I suspect this episode alone is why I love Ray as much as I do. I also suspect that I love Welsh for a lot of reasons but that his support of Ray and Fraser on this case is a top contender. The single best moment of the episode, though, is when Fraser asks Botrelle's attorney if she believes she's guilty, and the attorney replies, "That's an irrelevant question. The only real question is, do I think she should die?" And there's no elaboration, no anything, but -- well, first, Fraser concedes the point, which is more than enough. But yes, exactly.

Things that please me about Ray Kowalski: he is wearing all black in this episode, which is both symbolically fitting and looks damn good; he is perfectly suited to keeping up with various of Fraser's crazy acrobatics, which pleases me insofar as the symmetry of their relationship is concerned.

I have no idea what to do with Fraser's friend in public records. (Jocelyn, her name is? Maybe? I just picked out the most likely-looking name from the cast list.) I mean, they make each other giggle uncomfortably all the time -- but I kind of like the idea that Fraser just genuinely has a friend who likes some of the same nutty stuff he does and is just a giggly awkward person rather than specifically giggly and awkward at Fraser.

"Everybody loved Jake -- especially the ladies. Wanna know why? Sincerity. He had it down. You couldn't tell that he didn't mean a single word he was saying, or that as soon as you were out of his sight, you were out of his mind." Maybe it's irrational, but every time I watch this episode, this little speech pings to me as being About Fraser. That's absolutely not fair, because for the most part he does mean everything that he's saying, and he's good at remembering people and taking on their concerns and everything, but I still feel like there's some strange core of Fraser-truth here.

"You really like these dramatic revelations, don't you, Fraser?" "Not really, Ray. Actually all this exposition makes me feel a little thirsty." Maybe I'm just weird, but I love my meta in small doses like that. Also, it's a genuinely funny little exchange, which is really important because this episode is not rife with the funny.

Jesus, Sam Franklin. Knowing what was going on this time through, I was cringing a little for Ray in every scene with him, but I'm especially horrified that he does that avuncular side-of-the-neck pat on Ray after they take him down. The way he treats Ray just kind of terrifies me for reasons that I still find nebulous. And I suspect that he's a large part of why Ray starts sobbing at the end; I don't think Ray really genuinely trusts very many people, and that one of the people he did would do something like that...

Also, god, the whole last section. That Ray's willing to walk through the crime scene with Beth is amazing, and I don't think it's any kind of self-punishment or repentance -- if this was Fraser I might be assigning that sort of motivation, but when Ray does the right thing it's just because he instinctively compulsively does so. He intellectually wanted to square with being responsible for Botrelle's execution, but once he seizes on the idea that she's innocent, he's not following through with anything because he wants absolution; he's just doing the right thing. And at the end he's just doing the right thing too, by going through it with her because she wants that. The fact that he breaks down afterwards has very little to do with her reaction and everything to do with the fact that Ray thinks he's a screw-up. It's deeply untrue and Fraser spends a lot of time trying to convince Ray of this, but it remains that part of Ray's self-image is that he fucks things up, and nothing is going to confirm this more than the fact his actions started a chain that almost led to an innocent woman dying -- no matter that Ray was inexperienced at the time and then corrected things, because he still contaminated the evidence and cost Beth eight years of her life and trusted people he shouldn't have. I think Fraser knows this, and I love that he doesn't try to say anything or stop Ray, just makes a point of connection.

I also love that they let Ray cry on screen (in much the same way that I love that they let Fraser cry on screen, although that scene -- the one with all the candles, in the Victoria episode -- kind of rips my heart to shreds, whereas in this case it merely makes my heart ache a little). I'm not quite sure why it pleases me so much, because I'm actually much happier when they are happy, and (unlike with, say, Doctor Who; the Doctor's pain delights me because I'm a horrible person) I don't take any particular joy out of Ray or Fraser's misery. I think maybe it's because in the main their lives have this tendency to kind of suck in an understated way that doesn't really need to be addressed because that's how life is and you carry on and enjoy the good bits anyway -- but once in a while the show doesn't do the wackiness and the optimism, and that at least once or twice their unhappiness does get pointed out makes for a ... point of emotional connection, I guess? I don't know if I've figured this out yet.

This episode isn't zany or funny or anything -- the man in the bar, or Jocelyn and her bark tea, are probably the only genuinely bright points, and Frannie is nowhere to be seen (although I don't know if this was a storytelling choice or if Ramona Milano was off having her baby) -- it just is, and maybe has the most awful quiet ending second only to Victoria's Secret, and I ... am glad the show is not like this all the time, but I am fiercely glad that it does go here sometimes.


4x06 Mojo Rising

The beginning of this episode is actually quite reminiscent of Vecchio episodes: Fraser's driving appalls Ray, and style is very important! On the other hand, this Ray is anti-crispy-shirts, let Fraser drive the GTO at all, and they switch seats by climbing all over one another. So not too much like Vecchio. (Although we get the DRIVING MUSIC! I don't think there has been driving music since the Riv went into the lake they call Michigan, and it reminds me of Vecchio a lot. Now I want to go off and re-find all the fics were the Rays bond over cars.)

I think we are to assume that Ray has greatly mended matters with his parents since they came back into town; not only is his mother coming by every day to iron his shirts (I'd be horrified too, Ray) but his dad looks genuinely delighted to see him, and Ray is absolutely crushed about having lost the GTO, which I suspect actually has more to do with his feelings about his father than his feelings about the car. For that I can forgive Ray having even less tact than usual around the Haitians; thank goodness he at least pays attention to Fraser Diplomacy 101.

To be fair, once they figure out Gerome's innocent and something's going on with his daughter, Ray becomes perfectly well-behaved, so it's not like Ray has anything inherently against cultures that seem weird to him. In fact Ray is remarkably good at taking weirdness in stride, even if he doesn't ever stop thinking it's weird. (For the record, I think due South is Doing It Right when it comes to Fraser and his knowledge of other cultures? I mean, I'm not sure, because I'm not 100% sure myself what Doing It Right is, but as far as I can tell Fraser knows various languages and customs &c as part of his general Fraser effort to understand things and thus be able to relate to people without pushing his own assumptions on them -- not that Fraser is ever rife with assumptions, except possibly in the case of beautiful women -- and doesn't ever try any sketchy appropriation of the things he knows. I am fairly sure this qualifies as doing it right.)

Oh god, I love Welsh. Gerome says, "She's placing a curse on your station," and Welsh replies, without missing a beat, "In here, who would notice?" He pretends to be put-upon but he actually loves them all.

And Ray! And his dad! I love how Damien lets Ray know he sees right through him, and all of a sudden Ray is confessing all this dumb shit he did years ago. Like, he's the one who broke the lamp, not the cat. (I am, by the way, charmed by the fact that Ray's had a cat and a dog and a turtle. He's definitely the sort of guy who'd enjoy unconditional love from pets.) And that time he got a black eye, that was a fight, not something from the gym (which ... obviously, Ray). And he also did something horrible to the station wagon when he was fourteen. And for the most part this sort of thing is totally inconsequential but obviously it's been nagging at him for real. I'm so glad his parents came back to Chicago so he could deal with this stuff.

Fraser on the other hand will probably never learn how to express affection like a normal person. He's glad that Diefenbaker stays with him instead of going with Gerome, and displays his gratitude by -- well, he does thank Dief kindly but then he takes refuge in snark. Oh Fraser.